Magnetic Attraction

It is fun to play with magnets. Seeing a long chain of metal objects stick together is fascinating. Have you ever tried to push strong magnets together with the non-attractive ends only to feel an invisible force prohibiting your efforts? These two forces (attraction and repulsion) are at work in relationships as much as they are in magnets.

In the same way that a simple switch in the direction of the magnets can reverse repulsion and create an attraction in relationships some simple changes in mindset can help bring people together instead of constantly being pushed apart. You can make adjustments in your thinking and the way you relate to others to create a connection.

Romans 12:5 & 10 “so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves.”

Switches:*

1. Switch, “This relationship exists to serve me,” to, “This relationship is so I may serve.” It is attractive to think about the other person

2. Switch, “I will look better if I belittle the other,” to, “If I lift the other up us both go up.”

3. Switch, “Trusting another means I will be taken advantage of,” to, “If I trust others I will be considered trustworthy.” Pushing someone down when in a panic and drowning will probably cause you to drown as well. Striving to pull the other up you will both be saved. A person who is suspicious of others will be thought to be a suspicious suspect.

4. Switch, “I have to be right,” to, “I have to have peace.” Which is more important to you: peace or to be right? In issues of blatant sin then you must hold your ground. But most arguments are not in regards to an issue of sin rather a difference of opinion. Better to let the other person be right and save the relationship.

5. Switch, “Vulnerability means I will be hurt,” to, “Vulnerability means I will be healed.” Take for example a hurt tooth: The dentist will have to inject and inspect and you will be painfully vulnerable to him, but in the end that vulnerability will lead to healing. Without the dentist help you will have greater pain and maybe even lose the tooth. In a relationship if you do not open up to the other person then the sores will fester and you may lose the relationship; just as you would eventually lose a tooth if left unattended. Opening up will lead to healing.

6. Switch, “Transparency means they will see my weaknesses,” to, “Transparency means they will see Jesus more clearly through my life.” In our weakness He is strong.

7. Switch, “Just a little lie won’t hurt,” to, “Lies of any size diminish my credibility.” Being a person of integrity and honesty – even when it is reference to mistakes – will gain you credibility in the eyes of others. You don’t always have to take the brutally honest route; there are ways to be kind and honest.

8. Switch, “Criticism makes me look bad,” to, “Criticism helps me become better.” The attitude with which you receive criticism reveals your true motives in a relationship.

9. Switch, “To get what I want I have to take it,” to “To get what I want I have to sow a seed.” Reaping a sowing is a continual theme throughout the word of God.

10. Switch, “People are things to help me reach my goal,” to, “People are the goal.” I know that when some people look at me my head is replaced by a big dollar sign; I want people to want to have a relationship with me not based on what I can offer them, rather based on who I am.

11. Switch, “These are the conditions so one may earn my love,” to, “I choose to love unconditionally.” Love is a choice, not an emotional feeling.

12. Switch, “This person will never change,” to, “Hope that God is still working is the only hope I have for a relationship.” They say that a relationship is dead when one loses hope that the other can change. This is not to say you must remain close to an abusive person. The bible gives clear instruction about not becoming closely tied to people that display certain characteristics. But if there is no abuse, and only annoying behavior, you can hope that God is working on both of you to grow and change.

* These are examples given in a relationship where both are equals (marriage, siblings, friendships etc.). Things may look slightly different when a leader / follower relationship is being discussed (i.e. parent / child, boss / employee, teacher / student).

Pray for Our Troops

Though my life is lived out on Bolivian soil my heart is still American. I love the fact that God permitted me to be born in the United States. For that reason I wanted to take the opportunity to ask you to pray for our troops. No matter your political views. Our sons, husbands, fathers, friends and brothers are laying down their life for the freedom that we enjoy. Pray that God would be with them.

Nix the Ignorance

God will not be ignored. You’re familiar with the phrase that comes from the bible ‘God will not be mocked’? Here is how it reads in the Message version (Galatians 6:7-8).

Don't be misled: No one makes a fool of God. What a person plants, he will harvest. The person who plants selfishness, ignoring the needs of others—ignoring God!—harvests a crop of weeds. All he'll have to show for his life is weeds! But the one who plants in response to God, letting God's Spirit do the growth work in him, harvests a crop of real life, eternal life.

The implication here is that when we ignore the needs of others we are in fact ignoring God. This passage was doubly illustrated in my life recently.

The first encounter came when I was complaining to God (gasp!) about some of the difficulties I was having with some of the members of our church. I did one of those rhetorical prayers. You know; the type you don’t really want God to answer. I furrowed my brow and said, “See, God, this is why I didn’t want to be a pastor.” No quicker had the words left my mouth then I felt in my heart, “And it’s exactly why I wanted you to be a pastor.” Recognizing that we had a dialog going I wanted to talk out what was boiling in my soul. I started in with the reasoning, “Inadequacy spurs depression, disillusionment, disgust…” I wanted to continue with my clever alliterations but was cut short by this word, “…dependence.” There it was. In my weakness he is strong. It’s ok to feel inadequate just as long as I am not forgetting nor ignoring his complete adequacy.

The second incident of a call to personal action based on my trust in his enabling was that same night. Is two AM considered night or morning? My sleep was interrupted by the squawking of my toddler in the other room. Again relying on my futile cleverness I thought that maybe there was a way that this could be easily managed without me having to get out of bed. God hears our prayers, right? Well this one was not rhetorical, but it was lazy. “God, please give him peace.” I waited, hoping against all hope for the crying to subside. Over the increasing din in the adjacent room I sensed an answer to my prayer that my child might be given the gift of fairy-dust peace, “I gave him you.” The cuddling that ensued was greatly appreciated by my son who fell quickly back to sleep.

I thank God that he is teaching me how to not ignore him by not ignoring the needs of those who he has graciously allowed to be placed in my life.

In what areas of your life have you been nixing the ignorance?

Momentous Mothers

Listed below are the wonderful mothers I know who have impacted my own formation as a mother. I wanted to pay tribute to them. They are a treasure that I hold in my heart. The characteristics following their names (demonstrated in the interaction with their children) are the ones that shine out above all the many that I could have listed. The list could be much longer if I were to include the women throughout history that I know only through study and literature that have also aided me as a mother. To the women here in this list I say thank you so much for being who you are and making a profound mark on my life. May God bless you.

Organized in alphabetical order:

1. Amy R. – Valuing the journey
2. Beth W. – Care and nurture
3. Carolina M. – Encouraging individuality
4. Charlesene M. (my mother in law) – Strength
5. Claudia B. – Placing importance on heritage
6. Danielle H. – Being fun
7. Daryl C. – Learning
8. Denise H. – Unending and unconditional love
9. Emily H. (my sister) – Purposeful connection
10. Heather H. – Hope
11. Jill H. (my mom) – Serving and putting others first
12. Joy G. – Belief in others
13. Joyce L. (my aunt) – Prayer
14. Julie M. – Sacrifice
15. Kristy L. (my aunt) – Instilment of character and faith
16. Laura B. – Thoughtfulness
17. Laura K. (my grandmother) – Industrious
18. Linda K. (my aunt) – Making kids feel important
19. Lisa B. – Patience
20. Mary S. – Tenacity against all odds
21. Phyllis H. (my grandmother) – Being herself
22. Peri Z. – Giving value
23. Rebecca G. – Trust and friendship
24. Shawn S. (my sister) – Doting adoration
25. Tracy C. – Including her kids in the process

In the years to come I expect this list will grow as I come to know new mothers. I am grateful to my Lord for filling my life with the voices of these ladies.

Plurality of Scripture

And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone (Genesis 2:18)

Let's take this into the context of the born again Christian who has been breathed upon by God and now lives as a new creation:
And the LORD God said, It is not good that the Christian should be alone

We were created for a shared existence.

We share our existence with God. He permits this.

We share our existence with humans. He designed this.

Why people DON’T get together:
Millions of reasons: unforgiveness, past hurts, selfishness, laziness, low self esteem, prejudice, pride, self pity, poor influences, bad company, corrupted morals.

C.S. Lewis love quote:
Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket--safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.

Why people DO get together:
One reason: love

The primary purpose of God is his family.

1. Adam - created to share his existence with Eve

2. Noah - saved to share his existence with his family

3. Abraham - blessed to share his existence with his son

4. Israel - the Old Testament written about the shared existence of a group of people

5. Jesus - God incarnate to share existence as a human, called the Son of God

6. Early church - the New Testament addresses the shared existence of a group of people

7. Revelations – addressed the actions of the shared existence of the churches

It has not been until recent years that “personal savior” has worked its way into our vocabulary. God sees us as a whole, as a generation, as generations.

How would you evaluate your spiritual condition?
Us = standards, checklist, example: club membership
God = relationship, intimacy, example: marriage relationship

When you think about the condition of your spirit what do you evaluate?

Usually it is the observance or practices or disciplines that we use to evaluate ourselves.

I Challenge you to evaluate your spiritual condition based on two things:

Love the Lord you God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength

Love your neighbor as yourself

Comparison: When you evaluate the condition of your marriage you don’t think first in the practices that you maintain. You consider the strength of the bond you have with your spouse. The practices are important – but not the main thing.

Have you ever noticed that much of the bible is written in plural?

We have the mind of Christ (1 Corinthians 2:16)

We are more than conquerors (Romans 8:37)

Our Father which art in Heaven (Matthew 6:9)

You are chosen generation, a holy nation, (1 Peter 2:9)

In Him we live and move a have our being (Acts 17:28)

Lists that require interaction with other people:

Hebrews 11:39 - 40 “Faith heroes”

Galatians 5:22 - 23 “Fruit of the Spirit”

1 Corinthians 12 “Purpose of the gifts of the Spirit”

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 “Love check list”

2 Peter 1:4-8 “Great and precious promises for us”

Romans 12 “Christian living with a renewed mind”

It is vital that we are purposefully sharing our existence with other believers in the context of a body in a church.

Recommendation

One of my friends that I have gratefully reconnected with after more than a decade thanks to the wonderful world of blogging posted something that I think everyone should read.

I met Amy in Botswana (that is in southern Africa) in 1996. She and I were “the engaged girls” on the Teen Mania summer mission trip. We lost touch until last year. Now she is married, has a boy named Silas and has a little girl on the way due very soon. Their family is a testimony of the faithfulness of God. They will be moving to South Africa this summer. You can read her past posts to know more about this sweet family.

Here is the link:

http://expectantandbeyond.wordpress.com/2008/04/20/making-me-matter/

You will not be disappointed.

Excerpt "Breathe Easy"

This is the first chapter in my book Breathe Easy. I wrote it with the mind to connect Latin women with their Heavenly Father in a relationship that provides freedom from vice, addiction and sin.

CHAPTER ONE

The Woman

Intrepid she quietly made her way into the room. Many years of intimate interaction with human baseness had given her an austere and detached demeanor. Yet the group in the lofty hall noted a contrasting contentment on her face that did not coincide with her seductive stride. Unannounced a less observant participant may have easily mistaken her for one of the servants serving the meal. Yet all eyes were quickly drawn to the woman as she fearlessly approached the guest of honor.

But why would anyone have feared the great teacher? Surely he commanded attention by the authoritative way he spoke. Even children were drawn to the attractive way that he looked into the eyes of those he spoke to. In the past this woman did have reason to fear. Her former profession had gained for her the well known reputation of a popular but despised member of society. Her ungodliness had separated her from his deity. But those were things of the past; a not so distant past that seemed like ages ago. Things were going to be different now. She approached the teacher with her head drooping down causing her long hair to cover her face. She ducked away from his line of sight and positioned herself just behind the reclining figure. Now her gaze met his and she saw the same captivating eyes that were calling her from captivity; those eyes that poured forth such a mix of justice and welcome.

As she bowed low the clank and chatter of the meal slowed and finally stopped. Everyone watched in a solemn hush what this woman did to Jesus. The only sound to be heard were repressed sobs emitted from deep within the woman’s soul. She wept at his feet. The soul could not contain the emotion and it came spilling out in the form of warm salty tears. Her inclined posture causing the flow to run down on the master’s feet. If her eyes had not been clouded over by her tears she would have noticed that his feet were uncommonly dirty from waking around the dusty city. Little did she know that it was her own soul that was being cleansed as the filth dripped away from his feet to the plush cushions on which they rested. The crying subsided as this worshipful woman knelt. Not yet lifting her head she realized that she had wetted his feet and thus began to wipe them with her dark locks that hung down. As if to apologize and show her submitted heart she repeatedly kissed the now clean feet. Drawing from the folds of her robe the object of her intent in coming to this private gathering she began to pour precious ointment on the wearied feet.

She had known that he would be there. The gossip had traveled fast. Jesus would be dining with Simon the Pharisee. Her heart skipped to know that he would be in her town. She had heard of him, of the great miracles and wonderful teaching he brought. She had even heard his message personally. She had heard the words he spoke and they were like cool rain after a long dry summer. And now he was so close to her! Could it be her opportunity? Could this be the chance she had longed for? So long she had suffered under the weight of her affliction. So long had she heard the jeering and hissing as she walked through the market. She was known for her sin. There was no denying it. But now there might be just that small glimmer of hope to put that past behind her. Maybe this man brought the answer that would calm the torment that raged within her, maybe, just maybe. She had to act fast. Seeking out the most valuable thing she could she enclosed it in her robes and headed for the prominent home of the Pharisee. Possibly the precious ointment had been given to her by one of the wealthy dinner guests as payment for an intimate encounter. Nonetheless it was the best she had to give.

Her hands trembled slightly as she took the top from the box of alabaster. The ointment inside now seemed trite next to the magnificence of the man. But she had to express some kind of sacrifice of honor and respect. As the glistening liquid poured forth from the box and began to cover his feet the woman felt a deep sensation of release from her soul. Yes, this was the right thing to do, the only thing she could do; and more than that the best thing she could do.

The silence was broken when Jesus opened his mouth to speak. She had heard him before and now listened intently. Yet his words were not directed to her but to their host, Simon. Simon had been surveying the scene with mixed emotions. He had been so proud to have a renowned prophet grace his presence by accepting the invitation to dine with him. And now he was embarrassed and indignant that such a renowned sinner had also chosen to intrude. But then his pharisaical mind began to fixate on the validity of his guest. Was he really a prophet? If he really was who he said he was then he would know that this woman was a sinner. Why would he continue to allow her to touch him so? If he knew the truth then he would never allow it. This logical reasoning racing through his head was stopped abruptly by the calm yet commanding voice of the prophet on trial in his mind. Leadingly Jesus said, “Simon I have something to say to you.” Simon might have thought that Jesus was going to ask him to have the woman removed. He did not know that Jesus had been weighing the matters of the heart of the woman and the heart of his host. In his intellectual yet simple way Jesus presents a sort of riddle or enigma.

“Two men were in debt to a banker. One owed five hundred silver pieces, the other fifty. Neither of them could pay up, and so the banker canceled both debts. Which of the two would be more grateful?” Jesus asked.

Simon answered, “I suppose the one who was forgiven the most.”

“That’s right,” said Jesus. Then turning to the woman, but speaking to Simon, he said, “Do you see this woman? I came to your home; you provided no water for my feet, but she rained tears on my feet and dried them with her hair. You gave me no greeting, but from the time I arrived she hasn’t quit kissing my feet. You provided nothing for freshening up, but she has soothed my feet with perfume. Impressive isn’t it? She was forgiven many, many sins, and so she is very, very grateful. If the forgiveness is minimal, the gratitude is minimal.”

Then he spoke to her: “I forgive your sins.”

That set the dinner guests talking behind his back: “Who does he think he is, forgiving sins!”

He ignored them and said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you. Go in peace.”[1]

Thrilled her heart began to sing. The shame dropped away, just as a heavy cloak slides off the shoulders when the constricting tie is loosened from the neck. She was forgiven! Everything was wiped clean. Jesus himself had spoken directly to her telling her that her sins were forgiven. Then, what a compliment he gave her, this honored teacher; he commended her faith! Her faith, seemingly insignificant, was expressed in her solemn act of reverence. Yes, this is what she had hoped for. And it had been granted: salvation. Saved from the sin. Saved from the guilt. Saved from the heavy load. Saved, really, from herself. She could finally breathe easy.

First forgiveness, then salvation and finally peace were bestowed upon a once despised life. Go indeed. Yes, she would go and be in peace. Her whole existence submerged in that peace.

~

This story is true. It was true for the precious woman that had come to the end of her own self and found her only hope in Jesus. And it continues to be true for anyone who would choose to believe that Jesus can set them free from any and all oppression. Freedom is extended to the hopeful heart. Whatever it is that is pressing down upon you can be removed and forgiven. Jesus can forgive you. Faith in Jesus can save you. Jesus can give you peace.

“A woman in the city brought an alabaster box of ointment, and stood at his feet behind him weeping, and began to wash his feet with tears, and did wipe them with the hairs of her head, and kissed his feet and anointed them with the ointment.”

“Her sins, which are many, are forgiven; for she loved much.”

---

[1] Portions of this story were taken from The Message by Eugene Peterson.

The AM

Yesterday this:
Hope deferred maketh the heart sick… (Proverbs 13:12)

Today this:
… but joy cometh in the morning. (Psalm 30:5)

This:
My voice shalt thou hear in the morning, O LORD; in the morning will I direct my prayer unto thee, and will look up. (Psalm 5:3)

And this:
Cause me to hear thy lovingkindness in the morning; for in thee do I trust: cause me to know the way wherein I should walk; for I lift up my soul unto thee. (Psalm 143:8)

The long and short of it is that the prospective house help came to the house on Monday, I showed her around, explained the job, we talked about hours and pay and together we decided that she would start Tuesday at two. Two o’clock rolled around, 2:15, 2:35, 3:00 and still a no show. I call the number she gave me and talk with her sister, who is clueless. Then the work I had been saving (so I could train her how to do it) I had to do. It wasn’t the work that upset me. What upset me is that this is not the first time this has happened and it causes me to over analyze everything.

So what am I going to do if she decided to show up today? Good question. I will know when and if the moment presents itself.

Things look brighter now. Thanks to all who sympathized with me, I really appreciate it.

While we are on the topic of the morning… some of my morning sounds:
Cars in the busy street we live on
Airplanes over head
Husband moving about
My kids playing
Venders opening the market
Children rushing to the school in front of our property
Our pets asking for breakfast
Birds
Staff watching DVD bible school courses
Kids in the orphanage praying as I hang my clothes on the line

What is the best part about your morning?

Necessary Edification

In Spanish Ephesians 4:29 reads like this:

Ninguna palabra corrompida salga de vuestra boca, sino la que sea buena para la necesaria edificación, a fin de dar gracia a los oyentes. (Reina Valera 1960)

You may be more familiar with the verse in English:

Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers. (King James Version)

The verse in Spanish expresses my thoughts on this subject most clearly. Here is my understanding…

Not one word that is corrupt should be allowed to escape your mouth; rather that which is good for necessary edification, with the end goal to give grace to those who hear you. (Angie’s paraphrase)

In Spanish the noun ‘building’ is ‘edificio’ and the verb ‘to build’ is ‘edificar’. In English a building is also an ‘edifice’. So now we can look into this phrase: necessary edification.

The words we say can corrupt or build. Think of the foundations of a building. If rot, rust, infestation or other such corrupting elements set in the building will be unsafe to use and might even topple over. Our words can do that to the lives of others.

There is no middle ground here. Necessary edification indicates that the words we say can be the life line that another person needs. You can build the life of another person. Compliment and you are laying the concrete. Bless and you are laying the bricks. Your encouragement is necessary for those who hear you. First for the person you try to build up and next for the people who overhear you encouraging and imitate your efforts.

Pick a person to intentionally edify with your words. Trust me, they need it. Then come back and tell us how it went.

Re-birthday

Twenty-three years ago today a smiley eight-year-old girl searched for her children’s bible a notebook and a pencil. Upon arriving at church for the service with a special guest speaker she ran over to where her cousin, who was also her best friend, was seated. As the sermon commenced the girl would start to write down the things the preacher said that she thought were important. Not being able to write as fast as her companion, who was older by one year, she nudged with her elbow and whispered for her to write it down.

The message seemed to end quickly and the man up front posed a sincere and penetrating question: do you need something from Jesus? He explained that he wanted to pray with those who felt they had needs and invited them forward. The girls looked at each other and without a word headed down front. The man approached and asked the girls what they needed from Jesus. Both responded with confidence their need to be saved. He prayed with them. As the eight-year-old repeated those simple words she knew for sure that she was saved. Though the words have long been forgotten the truth of eternal salvation that was planted in her heart that day has never once been lost.

This is my story. The little eight-year-old girl was me March 28, 1985.

With clear understanding that the word always should be used sparingly I am going to use it today. I have always known the love of God in my life. From the first caresses of my mothers hand on my cheek until this day that I was wiping tears from my son’s face there has been a real presence of my Heavenly Father’s love with me. For this I am grateful.

Not once have I doubted, questioned, wandered away from or rebelled against the message of the gospel. Assurance, confidence and faithfulness have been the marks of my life with Christ. His truth is real to me. For this I am grateful.

Since the moment I first laid eyes on these words as a teenager they have been my own.

“And I thank Christ Jesus our Lord who has enabled me, because He counted me faithful, putting me into the ministry” (1 Timothy 1:12)

If you haven’t done so then you need to give your life to Christ. God loves you. Jesus paid the price for our salvation with his own life. He rose from the dead with the power to forgive you of the sin separating you from God. Tell him today that you believe and ask him for his help. He will hear you and give you the gift of eternal life. Let me know if you do decide to dedicate your life to Jesus so that I can congratulate you for making the best decision ever.

What wonderful gift from the Lord are you celebrating today?

A Yes No Convo

This is a short, little, out-of-the-blue conversation I had this morning with my 6 year old daughter.

Gabrielle: Mama, are tornados real?
Me: Yes
Gabrielle: Will Aunt Kristy be sucked up? (Worried look on face)
Me: No
Gabrielle: Oh good! (Relieved look on face)

As she went blissfully skipping away I chuckled to myself and wondered where that little worry came from. It amused me even more that she was relieved simply by what I told her. She believed it, was relieved by it, and physically manifests her complete trust with a sweet smile as she went about with her life.

What do I worry about? Surely my worries are much more serious and important than those of my child. But are they really? She was gravely distressed by the thought of her aunt being sucked up in a tornado. Are her feelings very much different from mine when I am concerned about all the “what-ifs”?

But my daughter made a good choice. She went to a reliable source to verify the validity of her preoccupation. And when she indeed found out that she was mistaken in her perception of reality she simply changed.

When I am worried who do I talk to? Nobody. Do I bottle it up and let it fester? Yes. Do I file it away in my mind thereby assigning it importance? Usually, yes.

Now, though, this encounter with my daughter showed me that it would be better if I took my worries to a verifiable source: God. That I would choose to believe what he said. And that I would simply change, trusting what he said to be the absolute truth.

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. (I Peter 5:7)

I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it. (Mark 10:15)

What do you do when you are worried?

Jasmine

Hanging from the beams, forming the roof and covering the wall of our back patio there was a jasmine plant. It was a special kind of jasmine that only had a scent in the evening and through the dark hours of the night. Frequently its fragrance called me to the bench situated under the uncut branches that I let grow wild. Drifting into another world in the freshness of the outside air after a long day I closed my eyes so that the sensation of the strong scent of these tiny white flowers would wrap around me and carry me as captive by its beauty. Even today I miss those evenings.

We live in another city now. But every time I pass a jasmine plant its fragrance grabs me and reminds me of the numerous nights I found renovation out on my small patio.

I think that this white flower could show us how God wants us to behave in the dark, difficult times of the lives of other people. Our fragrance of compassion and understanding can be like fresh air to help another make it through something hard. Sometimes during a painful time all we want to do is sit and not say anything while we are wrapped in the presence of someone who loves us unconditionally. The next time that you see someone worn down do not try to explain why, or tell them what they are obligated to do or even try to give them superficial platitudes. It is better to simply be with the person; maybe with a hug, or maybe with nothing more than silence.

“Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep. Be of the same mind toward one another; do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly. Do not be wise in your own estimation.” (Romans 12:15 – 16)

It’s Not Nothing

“Even the ones that know about God are doing it,” my surprised daughter exclaims.

“Maybe they are not doing it; maybe they are just watching,” hoping beyond all hope the older one attempts to console.

Standing at the window my children observed the rituals being played out below. Sights of dancing, costumes and heavy drinking filled their eyes. Loud music pumped through huge speakers thudded in our chests and rattled the glass.

Wait for it, wait for it. Dread of all dreads the inevitable question sits in the air after the child looks over her shoulder with a worried look on her face and asks, “Is it bad mom?”

Too angry, ashamed and annoyed by these customs to respond I didn’t answer.

The fact that they are differentiating between the choices of their friends to come to church one Sunday and then participate in the ritualistic observance of Carnaval the same week shows me their value system is being shaped. My kids seeing pagan practices first hand does not bother me. Maybe it should; but I am pretty sure that the inundation with the things of God that we provide sets a very clear standard before them of what we believe.

Culture is the physical expression of the values of a people group. Just as money does not have good or bad qualities culture cannot be classified as a good or bad thing. It is a tool that society employs. The uses of tools like money, a hammer, the internet and culture can and are brought into question as to the positive or negative effects that they have on people.

So we can look at the practice of throwing water balloons at anyone and everyone. Is it bad? We have to consider the effects. Then we can look at the two days of continual dancing and drinking. The effects that this has on people should be considered. Then we look at La K’oa (or Q’owa). This is the burning of trinkets made of paper and sugar along with certain plants and dried animal fetuses every first Friday and especially during the festivals of Carnaval said to bring the blessing of the Pachamama. What effects does this practice bring to the people of Bolivia?

Marginal Christians attempt a condescending explanation of the importance of keeping the traditions of the ancestors alive. Why keep alive something that is killing the soul of the nation? That is the ironic fatality of the issue though. The people feel alive and connected to something greater than themselves when they observe the traditions. The devil subtly twists what was intended for good and disguises the captivity as freedom and independence.

Abolition of all carnavalistic observances may not be a realistic goal. A close look at the Kingdom of God shows us that we don’t work from the outside in; rather significant and lasting changes come from the inside out. My goal is to work with people close to me. This begins with guarding my own heart. Then I have my own children and the children of the orphanage. After that the families of the church have been placed before me. Beyond that our influence extends through media.

Shaping the culture of their hearts is where I must focus my energy.

“You are the light of the world—like a city on a hilltop that cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp and then puts it under a basket. Instead, a lamp is placed on a stand, where it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father.” Matthew 5:14-16 (NLT)

Mist over Majesty

Misty clouds have settled on the mountains surrounding the city this drippy morning. They mask the majestic layers of the green wooded hills. All the while the little people below slowly go about cleaning up from the raucous the night before. They are wearing the same clothes that they slept in because they were too drunk and weary from the party to change. The expression of dull pain and exhaustion on their face is darkened by the bags under their eyes. This will be a long foggy day for them.

Just as their minds are clouded from all the loud music, dancing and strong drink the night before the city also lays shrouded in wet grayness. It makes me wonder if these are physical encounters for what is happening in the unseen realm. Do these ancient annual rituals of Caranval some how mask the glory of God with a mist that makes his majesty unidentifiable? My heart is disgusted and aches at this libertine time of such obvious denial of God in the land. These days of Carnaval are the last hoorah for the people before the 40 days of Lent; 40 days of restraint and fasting. This is the last opportunity to do all badness that can be done. Dances such as the “Diablada” (the deviled one) attest to the sheer evil worshipped now.

The layers of the grace and goodness of God are beautiful. Gazing out at the hills that grow from the flat ground inspire you to think about the powerful change that happens in the heart of a person that was once flattened by sin but that now is under the influence of the most power Force in the universe. Traditions simplify and cancel out the wonder attributed to our Maker. God is marvelous and full of mystery.

Pray for the Bolivian people. Pray that the Christians would be strong. Pray that this mist would be lifted from the land so that the majesty of God would be made known. Or rather, pray that the majesty and glory of God would be made known so that this mist would be lifted from the hearts of the people. For the truth is that just because the clouds are present does not mean that the mountains do not exist. The mountains are not affected by the cloud cover. God does not cease to exist when evil is exalted. God will remain. God will prevail. This is the more sure hope that I have in my heart.

Validation

Does the failure of another person punctuate my success?

Validation is something that we strive for on a daily basis. We ask ourselves, “Does what I am doing count?” It has at the start the word valid. Validity leads the hearer to assume that a thing has identifiable worth usually supported by concrete proof.

So when a person desires to find some kind of validation they do their very best to earn the respect and recognition and, dare I say it, the love of the people around them. But this kind of validation is received only when a comparison is made with other people. And, sadly, as humans when competition is present we sometimes resort to the cruel practice of pushing others down so that we seem to appear taller; when in fact we are groveling along with the rest in a mucky mire of self-righteousness. And evidence that we are truly lost in the vicious cycle of validation is when we answer an emphatic, “Yes!” to the postulation above.

But here is the core problem with the search for validation… we already have it! Our identifiable worth lies in the unique fingerprints that God the creator left on our precious hands. Our identifiable worth lies in the unmatched speech patterns floating on every simple word we utter. Our identifiable proof is that we are not ‘things’ we are human ‘beings’. We ‘be’. And that is all the validation that Christ needed to provide the concrete proof that supports these findings. He added his DNA to the scene when he shed his blood for us on the cross.

We don’t need to compete and compare ourselves amongst ourselves. The only validation that we need today is the assurance that for God so loved the world. Because he first loved us is the only validation we need to stand tall and be the brother or sister to come alongside another and not be too insecure to say, “Come on. You’re going to make it. Let’s walk together.”

Affirm the validation of the love of Christ for all humankind. Remind someone today that their life counts.

As a P.S. for further discussion I might add if it is true that we are to rejoice with them that rejoice and weep with them that weep it could be assumed that we are to fail with those who fail. The felt failure of another person does not punctuate my success, rather it bids me to come and empathize, pray with, encourage and forgive. For, are we not a body? Does not the pain of another member of the family affect me? Is it not by this treatment of the fallen that all men will know?

Become

Anymore in the hurry of life where the entire world is competing for attention messages get watered down so that they can be captured in nanoseconds. Slogans, sound bytes and logos are purchased with unbelievable fortunes just so that a company can make a lasting imprint on the grey matter in our heads.

But what about the soul? There may be commercial sciences that tell us how to make an impression on the mind of a person; but how do we make a lasting impression on the soul? The first few things that pop into my mind are art, music and great literature. Next I think that relationships, more than anything, shape our soul. And then even deeper than that is God. God knows the depths of the human soul.

Will God compete for our minds when his ultimate goal is our soul? When he does capture our soul does the mind simply follow along? What methods does God employ to draw us to him? Are the mysterious and miraculous any more effective than the simplicity and detail in the intricacies of his creation?

Seeing as he is God I could only assume that he would do anything it takes to captivate the human soul. But I do believe that there in one element that stands shining above the rest. He tells us that we can become.

Throughout history and the amazing accounts we read about the godly heroes of old attest to the truth that we can become. And not just “become somebody” as the superficial clichés of the day would entice to you buy into. Rather to really become and continue becoming. That, to me, is the most enticing aspect of God. He tells us we can become.

Pharisaical Pharmaceuticals

My passionate pharmacist uncle Jeff Langdon always says, “Better health through pharmaceuticals.” Next time you are at his pharmacy in the Walmart in St. Joe you can say hi to him.

Sometimes when I am reading the Word of God it feels like medication is being administered to an ailment. At times I am completely oblivious to the malady that would necessitate treatment, but the Great Physician knows and gently applies what is needed so that my spiritual health is no longer compromised.

Have you ever noticed how frequently, especially in the book of Matthew, Jesus addressed the Pharisees? The big deal with this group of people was that they relied on their own actions for the redemption of their souls and imposed on others heavy burdens of duties to achieve the self-righteousness that they enjoyed. The term “bible-thumpers” might be used in today’s vernacular to loathsomely describe them. They majored on the minors of requirements and forgot about what really counts. I believe that Jesus had hope for these people and that is why he took the time and breath to address them so strongly and so regularly.

Last night at church DaRonn ministered on the importance of self-examination. He talked about the importance of looking inward to assess your spiritual state. Both he and I have made it a practice for quite some time to do just that. Quite frankly we often say to each other, “I don’t have all the answers. I don’t know it all.” We have decided that in all our striving we have not yet “arrived”, and the truth is we really never will.

I did not always think that way. I used to portray many of the same characteristics of the Pharisees. I was a Pharisee. Case in point: when I was 10 we attended your typical non-denominational store front church. During praise and worship the leader would instruct the congregation to raise their hands and worship God. I was so very stubborn that I absolutely would not put my hands down until the minister instructed us to. I would look around (unless we were instructed to close our eyes) and see that I was following the rules and become disgusted at all those that were not following the rules. Not until he would say, “You may put your hands down,” did I even think about lowering my arms. And I thought that this was a part of holiness!

God, in all his grace, began to treat this area of Pharisaical tendencies in my life. His treatment has been a gradual dosage of his holy word changing me little by little. I am so grateful to him for it! There are so many, many verses that he has brought to me. This is one of my favorite portions taken from a chapter full of warnings for the Pharisees:

Matthew 23:23-24 (New Living, which by the way I refused to use in my high school years for reasons of sacrilege; God have mercy, sinner that I am!) 23 “What sorrow awaits you teachers of religious law and you Pharisees. Hypocrites! For you are careful to tithe even the tiniest income from your herb gardens, but you ignore the more important aspects of the law—justice, mercy, and faith. You should tithe, yes, but do not neglect the more important things. 24 Blind guides! You strain your water so you won’t accidentally swallow a gnat, but you swallow a camel!”

Jesus calls this behavior ignorant, blind and hypocritical. Such a strong and vivid admonition is given by the Good Teacher. So, today as I reflect and remember where I have come from I will refocus on where I am going. Today I choose to not swallow any camels. Thank God for his Pharisaical Pharmaceuticals.

Eggshells

“Walking on eggshells” indicates that within a certain relationship we are being extra cautious so as to not offend, upset or anger the other. It is assumed that there is tension; one is frustrated or even annoyed with having to be so guarded around the other.

In Spanish we have a similar idiom that has almost the same wording but a very different meaning. The phrase is “walk stepping on eggs”. One who is stepping on eggs is a person who looks down on another. This person has a critical eye when evaluating another.

Two extremes: in English the person is cautious and careful; in Spanish the person is haughty and proud. The similar tie is such a big nasty word (or so it might seem in our Christian circles now days) that we think it is nigh unto, if not the very definition of sin: judgment. Tolerance and judgment have been set on opposites sides of the room and we are to choose which camp we are in.

If you are on the side of tolerance you are on the “good” side. You keep your mouth shut and let people live their lives the way that they see is right. You plaster on an approving grin even when you know in your gut something is not right. You mutter soothing words of understanding when the person before you defends and justifies his actions with completely reasonable arguments; while all the while you are plagued with indignity on the inside. All this done in the (holy?) name of tolerance.

If you choose to root in the corner of the traitorous judgment then you are booed at by liberals and reformed conservatives alike. Seeing these criticisms as nothing more than persecution for the faith you rise up louder still with your public accusations of the evildoers everywhere. You crank your bullhorn to the loudest setting and march down the street with your picket sign denouncing all that is bad in the world. You hear about a fallen member in the Christian world and immediately grab the phone to inform your prayer chain of all the juicy, I mean important details so that she can “pray better”.

My familiarity with both side of the coin is due to the fact that I have behaved both ways. Beginning my walk with Christ as a Miss Goody-Two-Shoes I muddied my Sunday best in the ditch of undue judgmentalism and an ugly critical spirit. I was so blinded by the mud I was slinging that I prayed to God that he give me the desirous gift of sarcasm with which I would be better able to maim my victims.

I met my match in some humbling encounters that pulled me out of verbal attacks. But still stumbling along and feeling my way I fell into the slimy bog of tolerance on the other side of the road. In those murky waters it was easy to convince myself that I was mistaken by what I saw so it was better to be neutral. I began questioning moral truths that I knew in Sunday school but just didn’t seem to hold enough substance against the darkness of the real world. After all as a missionary I am not called to change the culture? Or am I?

Almost two years ago my husband and I became pastors. In these last six months I have finally begun to feel like a pastor; the main reason for this being that I have had to confront within myself this conflict between judgmentalism and tolerance.

This week I sat with a teary-eyed member of my church and as I listened I knew that the issue had been settled within me. This process of sifting and learning, grappling and thinking was put to the final test. I am sure that I will be moving on to a new issue very soon. But for now I am thankful that God brought clarity.

I know that you might be thinking, “So what is it? What is the answer?” It would be very hard for me to lay out months and even years of learning. At the end of this post I am including a link to an online 4 sermon teaching series that was a key in helping me. But the bottom line is that I am grateful that this lesson has been learned. Someday I might teach or preach about it. Just now I am contented to live it.

Look for the series: Judgment Call

The True Tango

My youngest son loves to dance. It puts a smile on your face to see him move to the rhythm of the music seeing as he is only 15 months old. Last night he found my CD of tango music so we listened to it. He was dancing all over the room while my fingers danced on the keyboard typing an entry for Existencia Compartida. It is my Spanish blog. It was quite inspirational typing in Spanish to Latin music. The post seemed like something that my English readers might enjoy as well.

As we listened it reminded me of our tenth wedding anniversary last year. We made an unforgettable trip to the infamous birthplace of the tango: Buenos Aires, Argentina. Tiny Tyler was with us due to the fact that he was still nursing. Perhaps he loves to dance because of this early exposure to music in that foreign country. Who knows? Could be.

On the streets of Buenos Aires there are tango demonstrations. The street shows require a team of three. There is the beautiful woman with her face all done up. Then there is the man who exists simply to accentuate the beautiful movements of the woman. There is also a sound man who walks around in the crowd hat in hand to collect the coins of the onlookers who have formed a sort of stage by encircling the dancers. These dance troupes must do well because they are on every corner of the wide pedestrian walkways.

Whenever we stopped to watch a couple dance, without fail one or two citizens would whisper in our ears with a sour face and a venomous tone something like, “This is not true tango!”

How could they tell this was not the tango? I was fascinated seeing them move to the rhythm of the music. One thing is certain, I cannot move like they do. But tonight as I watched my son I realized how they could feel so strongly. It is because they have experienced the true tango. They have seen it; maybe even danced it. They can make an authoritative comparison.

It made me think about the people who watch us Christians. What are they experiencing? Are they seeing some people go through the motions to collect a few coins and some weak applause? (Which are nothing more than superficial samples of love.) Or are they seeing authentic and true Christians? Can it be that Somebody is whispering in their ears, “They are not true Christians”?

The word of God gives us ways to prove the authenticity of a Christian. One of these is found in John 13:35 “By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.” I believe that if we would truly demonstrate the love of God to others then people would be able to distinguish authentic Christians. They are going to be fascinated when they see us moving together to the rhythms of the grace of God. And they are going to admire what a life can be with God.

Now, there are people doing all the right things with the wrong motives. It says in Colossians 3:23-24 “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.” Some think, “I am going to do the minimum that God requires of me just so that I can secure my place in Heaven, but do not ask anything more of me.” With a mentality like that you are simply putting on a superficial street show to earn a couple coins. But, in the same way that I believe the street dancers (if they wanted to) could dance the “true tango” so that the citizens of their city would respect them I believe that you and I can allow the love of God to flow through us in such a way that as we love others we are demonstrating true Christianity and we become an authentic expression of love to this generation.

Shall we dance?

Appointment on a Train

You know on the personality profile tests when they ask you for your perception of rules? Well, I always answer that rules exists to keep us safe. (Other responses are along the lines of: rules need to be challenged, rules make if fair, and rules make it boring.) I tend to be a person who trusts others very easily; thus rules are easy for me to follow. In fact I depend so much on rules that I put little rules on myself. It just makes life easier for me to have these standards in place ahead of time so that when conflict or pressures arise I refer to the previously established rule to make the decision. Trust me; I know that there are downfalls to this characteristic. That is why it is great that I am married to a man who believes that rules need to be challenged and is always thinking outside the box and pushing the limits. We are a good balance.

So as a rule I don’t break my own rules for the simple purpose of security. Well, a couple of weeks ago I broke one of my rules and suffered the consequences; but it turned out ok.

Rule: When reading books DO NOT flip to the last page to see how it ends and by all means DO NOT read the study helps, commentaries, or prefaces by anyone who did not author the book. DO read all these things after you read the book.

So I was getting ready for my trip to Uyuni deciding what to pack. I had to decide what books to take. I was 5/6 done with “Anna Karenina”. It is a very big book, as Russian classics tend to be, and it would take up space. So should I take it and risk a very disappointing ending, possibly putting a sad taint on the trip? Or should I take a quick read that doesn’t take up space and will not emotionally influence my trip?

This is when I broke my rule. It all happened so fast seeing as we have high speed internet. I googled Anna Karenina and clicked through the first link. Sure enough there was an insightful synopsis and they revealed the dire fate of the heroine! My gut was wretched; mostly because I was disgusted with myself for breaking the rule.

But then I made some connections that convinced me that if the only thing I packed was that book I had to take it along.

One of my life long dreams has been to ride a train. Marisol (my friend who organized the trip) told me that one of the legs of the trip was a 7 hour train ride. I was thrilled! Like jumping up and down, clapping my hands, where do I sign? Happy!

Well, this review that was made so convenient to me online had mentioned the theme of trains throughout the book. Anna is first seen on a train, a tragedy takes place at the train station, her son plays with trains, and the climax which concludes the book involves a train. I had picked up on that already but didn’t understand that it was integral to the ending.

So I was going to be on a train for the first time in my life. The book was leading up to an exciting train scene. Yes, the book is coming with me! And I am going to read that very part while I am on the train. It was decided.

Riding on the train was a fabulous experience. After a yummy meal in the dining car and a tea afterwards we headed back to our seats. I had an empty seat next to me so I was super comfy and could stretch out. This was my moment! Everyone was resting, it was dark, and the train was rocking. I pulled my book out and started reading. Everybody around me seemed to disappear. The only things I was aware of were the click-clack of the tracks and the gentle sway of the car. I read furiously fast. Then it happened. I knew it was coming. That is why I was reading it. It was wonderfully surreal.

The only spiritual observation that I can pull from this whole experience is that I think that God just wanted to set that up for me ‘cause he knows stuff like that fascinates me. Who could have known a month before when I started reading the book that I would be able to finish it in such a meaningful place? Except him! Amazing!

(I have one more silly little train story from that trip. Remind me to tell you about it sometime.)